First off, let me start by saying this: we are all fine; physically, at least. Mentally? Emotionally? Spiritually? Eeeeek. That’s a little iffy. What happened? Well, let’s just rip off the band-aid:

We aren’t moving home to Colorado, after all.

I am literally sitting in an empty house, all of our furniture and treasured knick-knacks are lovingly bubble wrapped in boxes, stacked ceiling high in my garage. We are literally eating off paper plates and the kids are having one big slumber party on our living room floors. We don’t even have our kitchen table put together, anymore.

We have been fully packed and ready to roll out since we listed our Georgia house for sale, which thankfully went under contract 36 hours after listing. We had literally planned to roll out of here on Monday morning, right after my full body scan. We had plans to see old friends and go to our favorite restaurants and hiking trails.

And it all came crashing down.

How Our Entire Lives Got Flipped Upside Down In Less Than 24 Hours

In order for us to move, we obviously had to have work. Randy was supposed to transfer with his job, working in management for a major retailer. There was a lot of moving parts, but it was basically a planned domino effect. One person did this, so another could do this, so another could do this, so Randy could do this. They basically were going to slide him in, nice and smooth – not a problem!

Except … then the Coronavirus began wreaking havoc on our lives. And quarantine became the new normal … and the dominos fell over side to side, instead of in the beautiful line we had laid out in front of us. The job Randy was supposed to get just never came to fruition.

No job means no home loan.

It’s as simple and final as that.

When it came down to the moment of decision, before we ended up losing our earnest money for the Colorado farm – I’m not going to lie about my reaction. I locked myself in our sad, empty bathroom and sobbed. Because the house is so empty, the kids could hear my echoed sobs from two rooms over, and came frantically knocking on the door to find out what was the matter.

I assured them I wasn’t okay right that second but that I would be, and that when I was ready to fill them in – I would. I went to bed, and the next morning we woke up and signed the documents canceling the agreement to purchase the farm.

I spoke with a couple of my friends about what was going on, and had some divine intervention from Journey and Kelly Clarkson (I can’t link from my phone, but you can check it out on my Instagram: https://instagram.com/p/B_N4_GyDol1/ ) … and suddenly, I felt better. Lighter, somehow.

Why?

Because I realized something. No matter where we are in the world, home is with Randy and the kids. We can be across the world in Japan, at 14,000 feet in the Rockies, or in the swamp of Georgia and it wouldn’t matter. Home is where my heart is.

And it was in that realization that Randy and I came to the truth: maybe we just aren’t meant to live in Colorado. This move would have been our third time trying to settle down in Colorado in 9 years and with this failed attempt, it dawned on us that as much as love Colorado, it’s probably just not in the cards for us to live there.

I would be foolish to dismiss what’s in front of my face: there’s a big, incredible plan for me somewhere out there.

I’m really not quite sure what’s going to happen – there are some things on the horizon, including a potential move up north. I don’t want to jinx anything, so I’ll leave it at that for now. 😂

Here’s what I do know for sure:

1) We are leaving Georgia, and soon.

2) We will eventually have our farm.

3) Everything is going to work out exactly as it’s meant to.

Until next time …